On the block where I live is a Firehouse. There are times when I walk or drive by I catch the firemen out washing their firetruck. I do sometimes find myself staring; not drooling, just staring. Cute butts abound, as well as rather muscular physiques. They always turn and wave hello to me, and I, like a giddy school girl, wave hello back.
Yesterday while I was at the grocery store, one of the guys (in uniform) was in the condiments isle, and wouldn't you know it, I needed some salad dressing! I have to admit, I looked this guy up and down a couple of times, and WOW, was he ever gorgeous. I smiled as I checked him out, laughing to myself for ogling. Is it the uniform? Is it being in my 30s and finding a new adoration of the male physical form? Or am I just a horn dog? Hummm, probably a little of all three.
This morning I told Larry about it, and he laughed at me. He actually said he was happy that I am a normal, sexual human being. "It's okay to look at the menu, just don't order anything off of it," he said laughing but there was a hint of seriousness in his response. Yes, it is true. I am a normal, sexually healthy young woman, and he is the same as a man. But we didn't used to be so "normal." I remember one incident when we were at a restaurant and a cute young woman was walking back and forth and then sat at the table across from us. I immediately picked up on my husband's uneasiness, as he was feeling somehow guilty for wanting to look at this woman. He started doing the whole looking out the side of his eyes thing that I just find creepy. I finally said to him, "just look already and get it out of your system." He sat there stunned, not knowing what to do. I could read his mind, "really, should I? She said I can, but now I don't know if I want to....naw." And that was the end of that.
I'm not so insecure that I deny my husband what is in his being to be. He is a man, and men look. If he didn't find other woman attractive, I would be worried. I married a man, and I want a man, not a de-sexed version of a man. I also don't want him to feel ashamed for being a man. I guess now the same applies to me as a woman. I will admit I don't normally look at other guys. It has to be extraordinary for me to want to "check out" another man, and this fireman was extraordinary. But I do enjoy the banter with my husband, as well as the total honesty.
Of course, I do occasionally throw in a little something to keep him on his toes. Just a gentle reminder......, "remember that every time you look at another woman, another man is looking at me." OORAH!!! Wait.....I guess the same could be said to me now. Damn!
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