The History of a Life

As I wrote in my last post, I recently visited my my aunt and uncle in a small Utah town. Since I have returned, I have reflected on the hours I spent talking to my aunt about my grandfather. There is no doubt that I have a special connection to my grandfather. I feel like I am more like him than anyone else in my family. Unfortunately he passed away one week before my 30th birthday. When I was 12 he moved from Utah to Missouri so he could have the " big Midwest farm" he had always dreamt of. After he left, a void in my life became apparent. Part of my life; the fun, childish, running around and landing in cow pies because I can part disappeared. When I was 16 my family made the one trip from Utah to Missouri, and that was the last time I saw him alive. My husband and I always said we would make the trip to visit, but as we were living in California, we always had some excuse not to.

A year before he died, he called me on the phone and we talked for hours. It was as if time had stood still. My grandfather was charming and charismatic. He had a sarcastic sense of humor and could get me to fall for any tall tale he told. He also had a mean streak, and was extremely stubborn (a Scottish trait that everyone in my family seems to have). Second of eleven children, he was on his own by the age of 16, joining the Navy during World War II. There is so much of his life I never knew. I wish now that I could have had more time, as an adult, to spend time with him. When I think about him I always see him smiling, mischievously, as if he just got me to believe in one of his stories again. He always told me I was special and different, not like the other kids. Strange... I think at the time I believed him, but felt guilty for thinking so.

Talking to my aunt, she revealed a part of his past that was left out of all the stories I had heard about him. Before leaving Iowa to join the Navy, he had himself a sweetheart. She was to wait for him until he returned home from the war so they could be married. He did return to Iowa, but instead of keeping his promise to his love, he found himself with my grandmother (apparently we Moore women have special gift of getting men to fall in love with us... wink,wink) who was visiting from Utah. They met and 9 months later my aunt was born. Five more kids soon followed. They were a horrible match, one that ended 10 years later. I say this knowing that had they not met, yours truly would not be writing these words. What transpired was a life one might call turbulent and trying, but he made it, and as things go, I believe he had a good life.

About 10 years before his death, this sweetheart from years past was on her death bed. My grandfather made his way to Iowa (she was still living in the same town) to visit her. I can only imagine what transpired between the two of them, but I believe that when they saw each other, it must have been like they were both young and in love all over again. As she laid in bed, she looked at my grandfather and told him, "I'll see you on the other side." She was still so assured that they were meant to be together even after marriages and children. I thought this was such a moving story, and although his meeting my grandmother was a requirement for my life, my hope is that they are together now.

After my aunt shared with me this story, she told me to go get some of his books that were on the bookshelves in the family room and take them home with me. It was easy to pick out his books because they were the same books that I would have picked for myself; history, nature, humanity, culture, and philosophy. This from a man who didn't finish 8th grade. Now I have a part of him in my home and get to brush my fingers over the same pages that his hands once touched.

I picked this Linda Ronstadt song because of the memories I have of it. My grandfather loved Linda Ronstadt, and her music was always playing in the house. When I was about 5 or 6 I heard this song and loved it. I would dance around, twirling my skirt in the living room. He would just sit on the sofa, watching me with a big grin on his face. As I danced and sang, the words "it's so easy" sounded to me like "its no webby." I don't know why, but I KNEW those were the words she was singing, and no matter how hard he tried to get me to see, I would not be deterred. Eventually, he gave up and let me sing it the way I wanted to (there's that old stubborn gene again). On my way home from Lyman, this song came on the radio. I found it odd because I haven't heard it in years. Call it coincidence, or maybe it was some supernatural force, but no matter what it was, it made me remember him. I smiled and hummed to the tune, and me being my grandfather's granddaughter, I had to sing it just the way he would have wanted me to...."its no webby to fall in love....yeah....its no webby to fall in love!"






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Now playing: The Verve - See You In The Next One (Have A Good Time)
via FoxyTunes